FoundAlongRoad

-()-
Here we go in these circles again
Lately it’s been more of an ellipse or maybe an eclipse
Not the shape but like the moon
Blocking out when it doesn’t consume
Like it’s there in the darkness
But this part is
Just weaving into everything else
Pain everywhere I turn and no way out
Wouldn’t wish me on anyone again
Tanked my worth like I broke hers
And hers and the cycle had no end
I haven’t been able to find the words yet..
Guess it doesn’t matter when it’s just for me then
But it’s in there swirling
Trauma mixed with regret
A dash of knowledge that this has to be the end
We were never meant
And I can never do this again
Repeating in my head when I think of you
Maybe that’s why you’re the one the universe would choose
Cuz I can’t hurt you when you’ll never want me, too
Safe for my issues that’s where I always run to
But sharp for my walls, an illusion
Cut them like paper can’t hide in delusion
I know that’s what I needed
I know this dirt under my feet is
Both familiar and heating to burn me out of my stupor
But what’s in it for you
Maybe it’s simple
I’m balancing on a thousand wires
And looking at the ground like I’m getting tired
But even when looking at you makes me bleed
It also whispers urging to be a better me
And if I fall you won’t dive underneath
That’s what I need
I can’t take anyone else down with me
-()- The worst of me
The way it leaks out
Like gasses hissing from beneath
Filling the room and my chest
Like come on just one breath
Let yourself down..
But I’m here right now
And the space between keeps me from falling too deep
Cuz it would collaterally
Damage you
I care, too..
I hope the day doesn’t come
When it isn’t enough
Against this guilt in me..
My side of the story is still only a piece..