FoundAlongRoad

(You were all but my wife..)

My personal vampire
So much worse than my fantasies
You suck me dry and then blame me
For not having more to give
For not filling that hole in you
And I was the worst to pick cuz the love I try to give doesn’t feel like it to you
And the things you need needed to change me and I tried so hard for so long
I gave everything but you couldn’t see
Until it was survival or you and I didn’t realize the choice I made until it was through
But I felt that I started to know myself
And I couldn’t go back to
Trying to be who you need
Who isn’t me
But for seven years I didn’t see
Didn’t let myself see
That it was always gonna be a choice
(I’m sorry I fooled us both)
I could never fit your mold
And you taught me the words to understand why
Then threw them in my face like I could overcome it if I try
I was finally learning who I am
And what I need
And it broke my heart
That it was the opposite of everything you needed me to be
But it broke yours too and now you want to break me
Just wanna let the water take me
No lifeguard no safety
No air to breathe

And I will never forgive you

I never meant to tear you open
your blood is all you ever see
I can’t hate you like you hate me
I knew from the first day
I just thought I could be better
And I pushed until it fell back smothering me
And then I pushed again

Survival instincts took me away I didn’t even realize until it was too late

And I won’t blame you for your nature
I was never quite able

I’ll be the villain in your story

But now that you’ve drained every drop from my heart and my veins
I’ll never look at vampires the same