FoundAlongRoad

I think the problem is it was almost all bad
And now you’re almost all good
Making promises and crying apologies
But baby it was all bad
I know you see it and wanna change it
But do you know how
Do you know why it was like that
How can I trust it
When I am the same
The one that didn’t matter or inspired hate
I have not fundamentally changed
Have you
Can you
Until you’re tested
And what about everything else then
Yes your addiction drove you
But the way you live and the only way you seemed to know how to love
Was what killed us
And everything about me seemed to grate against you
So how can I believe what you do
You were one person
In the beginning
Then a devil I didn’t know
For so long
That’s who I was living
With
When you were even home
And now you’re this third entity
More like the first but away from me
So how do I grow feelings back
Through all of that
And who will you be when you get free
I want to believe but what evidence is there over facts
I got over
Who you were
I couldn’t let go cuz I cared and you needed someone there even when you fought it
But it left us broken
Now you’re talking about the future like we have one
And idk how to tell you
When you are this you
And I should be able to
Fall back in love
But my guard is up idk how to bring it down
Other than you proving to me now
You can be the real you
But idk which one will be coming back to me
The broken pieces will you fix them or just hope for the best
I’m putting mine together and you feel like a threat
Which makes me feel guilty
And like I lost what should’ve been love
But I didn’t kill it you did
I sacrificed so much
So why do I feel so bad..
Cuz I want to love you again
I know I do but it’s not like it’s been
And idk if it ever can be again
I promise I’ll try if you do
But the words are too harsh on my tongue to tell you
Of all that was lost
How I’m unsure I want to build again
Prove it all wrong and maybe we can try again
But how do I explain it
Without breaking you too
For all you did I still don’t want to hurt you..
Especially this you..
Still selfish cuz it’s all you’ve known
I wonder if you’d make it up when you’re out or be the same as you were
Cuz you’re also soft but of course you are in there
And I believe you but idk how much feels real..