FoundAlongRoad

And I feel uneasy
And I feel torn
But also like I’m just unused to calm
With any other person in the mix
Raised and stayed in the storm
I can let the peace wash over me
Like maybe it could all be healthy
But this sense of doom following me
Shadows of proven patterns
Unlearning chaotic matters
Or the end creeping up in my chest..
Maybe all these torn open wounds
This stitched up healing
Is what brings this anxious feeling
Starting to feel myself again
Like looking around not recognizing
Where I’ve been
Trying to settle into it..
Moving on with bated breath
What do you mean there’s softness in this
Beautiful heaven sent
Learning how to be learned gently
This shredded skin isn’t used to it
This smoldering mind wants to rest
But long since
Forgot how to do it
To trust in anything
The systems are nervous and yearning
And throwing tantrums before curling
Up with fragile hope
Soothing myself
Hush now
Let it go
Let it flow
How it will
Close your eyes
You will heal
Maybe there will be good things here..
And if not
You’ve made it through so far
Lucky if there are
Miles to go
Shaking like it can’t be contained
Anymore
Push it down cuz if it gets out
It may never slow
Turn the handle like a faucet
Slow drip
We can feel this
Let it ache
Let it grow
Like a steady hand on a racing heartbeat
Still here
It’s all real
For a moment or so
All the moments left to go..